Friday, 3 April 2009

Today I calculated the amount of time I had spent worrying (in the afternoon). It totalled just over 5 hours! I count worrying as having a churning sort of feeling in my stomach and feeling on edge. I have gotten used to doing other things whilst worrying, although I can't achieve my full potential when I'm anxious in this way.

Artists often talk about changing a space or an atmosphere with an object, I feel that I can change this counter-productive use of time, make it purposeful. I decided I am going to clock-watch obsessively for a week (until Friday morning), and calculate the amount of time I have spent worrying, and then, no matter how long, I will occupy myself with something "other", to change, displace, the way I use my time. I intend to occupy myself with this "other" activity over a continuous period of time, as I think that, no matter how I document this experiment of sorts, my activity/performance/appearance will show the time progressing.

I believe that, in 'timing' my worrying, I will alter not only the present - turning a fault into an asset, counter-productive time into time well spent - but I will also alter the way I experience time within my experiment.

I am also keeping a record of how much time I spend eating and making cups of tea. Partly for comparison's sake, and partly out of interest. I may well do similar experiments, but I think the main thing is to do with worrying.

I have been continuing with the idea of distance in terms of cups of tea. I have decided to try going up, as well as across. I feel that thinking about direction in a less linear way ties in with the idea of changing time, of thinking about sound as art. I will take my friends to the Heath on a sunny day, we will picnic and climb trees and it will be like something out of a famous five novel.

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